Image: Masterminds and Wingmen by Len Lantz (CC BY-NC-ND)
Synopsis: Len's Star Rating: 8 out of 10. The best book on bullying among boys.
BY LEN LANTZ, MD, author of unJoy / 1.4.2020; No. 4
Disclaimer: Yes, I am a physician, but I’m not your doctor and this article does not create a doctor-patient relationship. This article is for educational purposes and should not be seen as medical advice. You should consult with your physician before you rely on this information. This post also contains affiliate links. Please click this LINK for the full disclaimer.
Star Rating – 8 out of 10
Rating guide: 1 = horrible, 5 = average and 10 = wow
Author
Rosalind Wiseman
About the author
Rosalind Wiseman is active in social justice and founded Cultures of Dignity, an organization that works with communities on combating hatred, bigotry and fear.
General description
Masterminds and Wingmen is a book about boys’ social dynamics and bullying. I am a child psychiatrist and I recommend this book to parents whose sons are dealing with bullying. One of my favorite parts of Masterminds and Wingmen is the description of the hierarchy and different roles in a clique: Mastermind, Associate, Bouncer, Entertainer, Conscience, Punching Bag, Fly and Champion. Boys who are on the bottom rung of their social group are not necessarily in a bad position. Understanding how your son fits into his social group will help you to know what he is going through and the codes he adheres to.
Unique and most important aspects
Rosalind Wiseman really understands cliques and how social hierarchy and dominance behavior can influence boys inside their social group. My overall impression of Masterminds and Wingmen is that it is a necessary resource for social issues specific to boys. Important ideas from this book:
Introduces the ALMB (act like a man box) as distinct yet unwritten rules in boy group dynamics
Describes landmines, which are interpersonal responses that shut down rather than improve communication in relationships
Defines the hierarchy, roles and behaviors in boy cliques
Outlines the role of Ally, a good person to give your son quality advice
Describes the SEAL strategy for boys who are dealing with relationship conflict
Covers other topics not related to bullying that are important in a boy’s life
Best quote
“Within any one group, most boys have a best friend, a three- to five-boy inner-circle core group, and then a few more guys who they associate with as part of their group but they’re not close to – that is, they don’t do things one-on-one. Boys have assured me that these roles can be found in every group, regardless of social status.”
Who would enjoy this book?
Any parent of a high-school-age or younger boy.
Who would not enjoy this book?
People who struggle reading longer books may not enjoy Masterminds and Wingmen. It is a comprehensive book. If you tend to like shorter books, you may want to look elsewhere or purchase this book as an audiobook.
Conclusion
Masterminds and Wingmen is an excellent book on social dynamics and bullying among boys. Parents will find this book to be a helpful resource in helping their sons navigate the unwritten rules and codes that boys follow.